cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
