For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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