until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Randomize
