These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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