She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
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