Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Randomize
