Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
