I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
There's always time for handjobs
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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