the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
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