I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Randomize
