Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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