Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Drake has all the answers
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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