So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
