i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
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