You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
send nudes
from the living room?
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
