Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize
