He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
