I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
my poor anus
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
