I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
