Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize