if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I am never drinking with the goths again.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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