it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize