i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
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