Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
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