Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
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