DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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