Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
We were destined to go to rehab together
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
