Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
