hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize
