those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
I forgot how hot balto sounded
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Randomize
