just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
