Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
You should frame my arrest warrant.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
