how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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