he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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