Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
