what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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