why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
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