Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Randomize
