return my video game
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
