When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Randomize
