i will never coherently bang her
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
I have post one night stand depression
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
