these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I don't think brook has ever known best
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
two words...techno handjob
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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