capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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