before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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