My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
