im six kinds of drunk right now
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
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I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
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So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
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