U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize