Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
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