It's Friday. Sex?
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
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