Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
